Thursday, December 24, 2015

‘Your wife has gone somewhere without telling us!’

May 14th night 2007

Around midnight, the nurse came to administer pain inducer. I was determined to have a vaginal birth or a natural delivery. She came, she placed the pain inducers in the birth path and left. Exactly after 2 hours, I was profusely bed-wetting… With my huge tummy, I hardly could carry myself and rush to the washroom. I called out my husband, who didn’t have any clue on what was happening. Neither did I for that matter. Litres and litres of fluids was jus leaking without my control. Confused, embarrassed – a 26 old lady bed-wetting, not able to hold or control the flow. Damn, it didn’t occur to both of us, my water broke and the baby had started to descend…

We frantically rang up the nurse station. She came and asked me to follow her. Took me into another room, where there were many impendent mothers waiting for ‘that’ moment… Some crying in pain, some moaning not able to withstand the contractions… Well, I walked into the room, got on to the table and allowed the staff to do what they are supposed to do. Fetal heart beat was good… I recollected from Eric Segal’s ‘Doctors’ how a little indifference from the care givers there could actually render me or the baby with some irreversible damage. All I knew was how alert I had to be at that moment. But still I didn’t know what overall was going on, what was going to happen next!

Within a few minutes, I joined the ladies gang in giving my voice to the already existing cries. This time, nurse arrived, not at my behest though, to instruct me not to make noise. ‘Don’t cry, moan, shout, wail. It is disturbing others’! :D I looked at the clock, it was 2:30 AM. I knew what was coming. I know from ‘What to expect when you are expecting’ literature that a prima patient has to survive this pain for 10-14 hours... Contractions became closely spaced and I felt as if somebody was hitting my lower back spine with a hammer! Tried to walk around… holding on to the door, clenching my teeth, I cursed myself for having chosen ‘vaginal birth’. I jus felt ‘this isn’t worth it. Somebody please do something!’

Right then, looking at my condition, again she came and asked me to follow her. This time into a lonely room, administered enema, inducing bowel movement. It was the actual delivery room. I had graduated to the final stage… It was close to 4 AM. I went inside the toilet and then everybody forgot about me…

Couple of hours later, the nurse went out and questioned my husband on my whereabouts! With that question, labour pain shifted to him. :D Both Chandra ma (my caretaker mom, we hired) and husband panicked. ‘Your wife has gone somewhere without telling us. Please help us find her!’

I was still sitting on the commode and trying to push the stools out, lest I wouldn’t qualify for the next phase! Two hours of pushing, I was exhausted but I was preparing for the next 10 hours of pain and at worst case, a C-Section. I used all my might, to follow what was told. Never had I been so meticulous in following something.

Close to dawn, finally, one of the sisters there came in search of me inside the labour room, rest room. There I was, finally… gave up passing stools and I thought let me try something else. J Commotion of the missing patient was going high and they had to allow ‘Chandra ma’ to actually see me so that  the case might be rested. She said ‘Stomach has gone down. It is going to be over soon’ I didn’t quite believe but I appreciated the kind words. She did my hair and wiped the sweat and left the place in concern.

Delivery team of nurses helped me get on to the labour table. Again, I was at my job of pushing. And then, I sensed agitation among the nurses. Nurses pleaded, ‘No more pushing. Please don’t push. We are not ready. Call the doctor. Head is seen. Put her on IV. Bring a towel.’ I didn’t have much energy to resist anything. At 7 ‘o clock, May 15, 2007, it was over. I delivered a pink 2.56 kg baby! I didn’t care to know the sex of the baby and was disappointed to know the weight. I stayed disappointed for atleast 3 years, thereafter!

Thursday, April 16, 2015

He is not my kind of a guy!

I met him. He appeared like a geek. Extremely strong in concepts of software languages. I admired him for his knowledge and articulation. But he is not my kind of a guy!
Dark, Tall and Handsome – DTH was what girls of our time were interested in…

My training got over. We parted ways having great admiration and reverence for him in me. But he is not my kind of a guy!

After a couple of months, I saw him in my work place. He came to see one of his friends. Casually exchanged a ‘hi’… I was quite excited to see somebody, a known face in the new work environment.

Few weeks passed by… One fine evening, rather night around 8:30, I again met him in the bus stop waiting for our MTC buses (obviously!). My sweet J24A bus never arrived for 40 minutes. We engaged in career discussion. Everything a fresher would be interested to know I asked him. He kept on missing all his buses until I got mine and boarded on to. Great ambitious person with keen aptitude… He proudly presented his business card. I was glad having found a “mentor” Nay! But he is not my kind of a guy!

I was eager to drop him a note next day itself. But I held back. “What if he thinks I am drooling over him” I spaced my email a week after… I clicked the ‘send’ button and consciously forgot about it. I didn’t get a reply for more than a week. But when I received his reply I should say I was elated. Warmth spread all over his email. Such a nice gentleman, I thought! But still, he is not my kind of a guy! A very good acquaintance!

So, jus to return his gesture, I too sent him an email! No! Not immediately, after a day or so :D Return of "return" of emails continued… We switched over to messenger instead of emails. You know, we wanted instant replies! :D

It was newyear’s eve! 2002 was bidding a grand goodbye to all of us. We decided to meet in a near by coffee shop. “ What am I going to talk to him!” I wondered.
He was talking about his MBA plans, career, technology etc etc. I tried my level best to match him, mostly listening and asking “relevant” questions. :)

A good friend, may be... He is still not my kind of a guy!

Days passed! Our comfort level was increasing. Both of us were flowing like a stream. Our thoughts unbridled…
He was outright in saying “Don’t fall for me. I am not ready for another mishap. Let’s be good friends”. I liked the honesty in him and anyway, I was not “interested” in him.

A few more days passed… “What the heck! Where are we heading to? Let’s get married!” Didn’t care anymore if he was my kind of a guy!

He is still not my kind of a guy. We are poles apart in character, interests, hobbies, skills, ideologies, taste, everything. What is of importance to him falls to the bottom of my priority list! And vice versa!

I don’t consider him my husband. He is my friend with whom I am ready for a conflict any time.
But still at the end of the day, I look forward to his presence to complete my day!

My father in law commented "Leave two idiots alone and give them sufficient time. They would fall in love" How true it is! :)