Savings...

My name is Abirami Mohanraj. I am a manager in a reputed IT company. I am married to Rajasekhar Vuppaladhadiam and have a kid of age 4 years. We both earn quite well and have a happy living. Life definitely presents its own challenges every now and then and thankfully we are also bestowed with the necessary tools to overcome them.

I was brought-up in a middleclass family. My dad with four kids and an ailing wife fought all along to position us where we are right now with extra-ordinary grit. I know what is poverty, I know what is pain, I know what is embarassment! But I am also proud of my childhood, for I am what I am now, because of it.

And today, I suddenly feel like a new brahmin! Nay.. it is certainly not what you think. I don't intend to create a racial clash here. Brahminism is considered superior in our caste system. Likewise, in this society, where everything is valued by money, I became a new brahmin in terms of materialistic richness.

From ashes to honor, should I say? Well, whatever, the urge in me to help, share and give has always been quite high. A number of times, I have surprised my husband with some instant decision to offer/donate/give something to someone :) and so far he has never said 'no'...
Conversations like these happen in our home - My husband asks 'who is he?' and I reply 'Oh, he... I asked him to come home to collect the donation cheque from us. So how much, 5, 10, one-time, monthly, yearly, ECS?' (actually I made up my mind already on how to donate, what to donate!) In all these, he participates whole-heartedly, that's the best part in him :) and why not when we both share similar life styles throughout...

But for these acts, my life would have been so bitter and ugly I would say... Finally I identified sweetness and fragrance in my life... These small drops of sweetness that I enjoy, I wouldn't let go of, come what may. This joy is not simply because of giving money. It is because of the human values I get back from it.

The smile in those kids' faces when they receive their new school kit, the smile in those oldage home in-mates for having a sumptuous meal that we sponsored as a group, the satisfaction in that parent's face when she sees her daughter go to matriculation school, giving all of them a ray of hope to survive - This light and fragrance, that I breath is so overwhelming...

When I die one day, there would be tears down our sponsored children's faces and many others - these tear drops are the savings for my kid! :) One of my well wishers told me 'remember, you have a daughter'... Yes, I got to save for my daughter and here it is - 'Grace'

Before I wrap up this article, one last bit - Let me also say, I am not gullible. Like I brought in another visitor for my husband - 'who is he now?', 'oh he... Bank person - Demat account. Stock market is not doing good now, good time to invest!'

Life is a balance, full of debits and credits! :)

Stoned and stunned!!!

It was reasonably dark. I returned from work early, compared to the guilt-filled late night hours. While I was entering my house gate, there was this usual street dog who resides in around our parking area... I ignore it and don't care to acknowledge it. Rather too busy even to glance her. There are four houses in the apartment... Through the day the dog would spend time inside, sometimes outside the gate. When she is out, someone needs to arrive at the gate, so that the gate will be opened. Today, when I returned, she was staying out. Casually, I just happened to look into her eyes! I was stoned and stunned... so much emotion overflowing. I asked her 'ammu kutti, would you like to stay inside dear'. First time I spoke to her I suppose... She replied very beautifully, 'she came behind me waging her tails gleefully' It kindled a different emotion in me.
There is so much of love all around us, in a leaf, a rock, a flower and more abundantly in animals too. But I suppose, we are going behind human beings to share it.

[No wonder Americans prefer Pets, to their spouses! They are already ahead of us... ]

I am not patronizing to have pets at home certainly. All I am conveying is that it becomes easy to respond to life around in a graceful way when you experience something like this! I don't think I will go, caress her, for I am forever afraid of that species. But my heart will beat for it!

Make a Move and Now!

Aggressive or Competitive or Complacent - which is better?

As I write this article, there is only one thing that comes to my mind - Being at peace with yourself! Nah... certainly this is some kind of gyan I am trying to sell to anyone!

Of late, I came across a lot of people, with different kinds of worries, problems - most of them work related. As I question more and more into their problems, I saw only one root - Comparison!

It is like 'Why not I get a mother-in-law like her?, 'Why not I get a manager like him', or 'my age - but earning twice as me', 'saree exactly of the same design and color would be awesome' There is nothing wrong with it! Absolutely nothing!

Even my 3 year old is like that. 'Mom, I want the same ear ring as yours ;-)' She feels mine is better!

Money, success, position, health, better balanced family life - I think we got to understand one comes at a cost of another... How mean is our society or nature or whatever is responsible? Why not everyone have everything? Well, it is a useless question and I call it so, because I don't have an answer! :P

Now coming back to Comparison - whomever we compare with, one may have say more money, but not health... another one may have position, but not money etc etc... Most of us comfortably ignore what it has taken for a person to get where they are!

Oh yes! I hear you 'I know all of this and more' For those impatient folks, here comes the conclusion - If you think you don't have something may it be a better job, role, career, health or personal life (sorry, I don't include better spouses here - got to live with them anyway, because they have become necessary evils in our lives - Again there are exceptions and I hope exceptions are in great number :) :)), just move your ASS!!!!!

I mean MAKE A MOVE! Look for a better healthy diet, exercise, talk to your manager for a better role, look for a job change, see how you can spend quality time with your family, - To act on whatever you see is missing in your life! ACT NOW!!

Is the problem solved? not really... "I also act on my shortcomings, but my peer or neighbour is also acting fast and he also progresses at the same pace!" "What to do now? When will I become he or she?"

I am not writing anymore... Well, if I read this to my little "logic" princess at home, she will say, 'Ma, don't compare ma! I have mine, they have theirs' :)

Good luck folks!