How can we expect NYC Penn Station here?

I got down from the bus crushing that small paper between thumb and index finger, so tempted to toss the bus ticket in the road. Heavy contemplation was going on - like there are lot of garbage in the street and the small paper ball I have is almost negligible and would make no difference... But I didn't...

I am an ardent patronizer of this practice. So whenever and wherever I go out with family and friends, I act consciously and without talking about it, I spread this concept - "Don't treat all places like garbage bin; use designated bins" (Yes, Yes... I hear several cries - please show me one such stuff in our Incredible India...)

I watch people traveling by cars and trains, unscrupulously abusing the already handicapped streets and roads... Railway tracks are usually around the city, suburbs, rocky mountains, across the rivers, farm fields etc etc. Millions of people frequent these tracks every day. As a culture and practice, we hurl plastic water bottles, Lays chip cover, polythene bags in which we brought packed food from home, paper cups among thousand other things. I think our gray matter can compute the aftermath of this ill-use without much articulation...

What about people traveling by cars - Vrroooom! Bring the power windows slightly down, chuck the stuff out and close it immediately... Done. Got rid of the waste! Oh really?? Remember when you get out of the car, you would be stepping on the junk copiously cursing the junta who have done it!

This is what I do... When we travel by train, I leave all kinds of scraps under the berth but not dispose it on the tracks; or I carry them home. I am fairly sure some routine cleaning happens in the coupes. By car - I again resist my temptation, collect it in several niches provisioned in the vehicle and finally clear stuff when I reach home.

So, now the interesting part comes...
We were on a vacation to Ooty and Coimbatore along with my BIL's (Sri anna) family recently. I had booked the return by train. It was quite a job to reach the station platform with 4 kids and several luggages. My co-sister was obviously busy feeding the tiniest of toddlers who traveled with us - Jyo - the 2 year old and I caught her redhanded when without thought she dropped the parcel covers on the tracks. I was like 'has she dropped?' as if she lost something important. Sri anna curiously enquired 'yes, she did. Why what happened?'. Immediately I quipped 'Then how can we make this like the NYC Penn Station?!' :D

I am not writing about drivel disposal (I mean spitting :P!) which is again another irritant found among the country habitant. I hope and pray the readers of this blog don't own that exclusively "Indianized" filthy unhealthy habit!

Bare handed...

What 9/11 is to the world is 6/11 to me. It is totally devastating. I didn’t know parting can be so painful. I am talking about the loss of my beloved iPhone. I am not a person who cared about materialistic stuff. To me, anything and everything other than life is redeemable. Hence I adopted a carefree approach towards pretty much lot of things (I mean non-living things). But today, I see myself in excruciating pain, pain of loss of a dear one. There is not a single moment where I was away from my cute monster phone. I carried it even to the rest rooms checking emails, facebooking, playing games, browsing and at times talking to someone. It was my third hand; It was the ‘Rest of Abi’. Now without it, I feel barren… Every time I move out of my desk, I watch my bare hands only to know my personal assistant is no more.

May be I relied too much on it for the much caused agony... All those lovely pictures of my kid, her recent hair-do we did yesterday, her dancing video clips, funny expressions which I flaunted to a lot of my friends - All gone in one shot! Someone, please tell me I am living through a nightmare...

My mind is refusing to look beyond – to see, what can be done next. A lot of times, I have thought no phone can replace an iPhone. An iPhone can be replaced only by an iPhone. He is special and no one can come close, certainly not an android. He was my symbol of pride!

The fact that I can’t get him back and not even a similar one is kindling my tear glands to pour more and more. As I carried him in my lap today when having a pillion ride to my office with my husband, I didn’t realize he is going to slip out of my lap forever. When I comfortably kept the phone at home, Raj promptly (as he always is) asked me if I had taken my phone. Gee… No! I went rushing back to collect the phone from my sister who had brought it half way through. He perfectly murmured – “why not you throw it away as you don’t care about it anyway?”. In another 10 minutes, my intelligent device was gone!

One call from my colleague, the reminder from Raj, bike ride instead of a car drive and the fact that I was carrying too many stuff in both my hands today – acted as catalysts to today’s event, while the main ingredient was my carelessness! With this, I also lost the kids’ playmate. What answer do I have to them?! My dad, if given an option, will send me out of home! My husband, but for the marriage vow, would want me quarantined for my eccentric behavior…

All is over. Now ever waiting for that miracle to descend upon me (which I knew cannot happen)…

Is it jus Silicon Valley made of ICs?

Things have changed so much from the early 2000s in the global IT industry. This article brings an interesting plane of view from my experience.

Customer is the backbone of any business. Someone who has being doing business remotely with us, the IT companies, wants to visit us is a big deal – it means customer satisfaction, more business, better relationship. So without doubt, the preparation that goes into welcoming the “clients” home (India) is enormous. Yes, I am going to about client visits.

Last year, I managed two such client visits – who are direct clients for my project. So, it rested on my shoulders to achieve the above said goals. As a fresher in 2002, I had participated in client visits, where the client would exchange a few pleasantries and ask some plastic questions – how do you like the project, etc. What would dread us is the unfathomable accent of white skinned “American/English”. We would have the answers ready even before they could ask us :D

However, in 2011 I was up for a Chinese-American client visit. They are different from American clients that we saw in early 2000s. I'll tell you how. When I asked him ‘where shall I book the stay for you?’, he came up with something like this ‘I am fine with anything, I promise I won’t complain. All I need is a place where I could rest and get ready for the next day’. Too simple, isn't it? Is that all? At another point of our non-business conversation, he queried, ‘So, you follow Hinduism. Do you know which came first, Hinduism or Buddism’ (!!) I composed myself a little bit and said with a sincere smile on my face, ‘Gautama who founded Buddism was a Hindu by birth. So…’ and he ended the statement. No conclusions here please. Just that it was strange!

For an American company, a Chinese is managing the work done by Indians! Perfect testimony for the book 'The World is Flat' by Thomas Friedman!

My first client visit was a huge success, Generally, we call it so, if the client eats, drinks, pees and leaves the place with no complaints :P

Moving on to the second… “Client Director is coming over to visit the Indian team.” Now, who is he? He is an Indian hailing from a Southern district of Tamilnadu! Now this would be difficult as we couldn't awe him with any of Indian stuff like food, culture, dress, politics, or anything at all. They are up to date with the latest happenings including the movie release of Dr. Vijay.

But I am kind of a person, who could engage in a non-stop talk even with a deaf and dumb person. I had no problem in tuning myself to engage him. Different kind of conversations, main one being land value and apartment cost was analyzed.

A brown skinned person of 5 foot 8 inches tall (approx.), clad in light blue shirt, red tie and black trousers speaking impeccable professional American English. Neat! But that’s not what was striking about him. It was the black thread tied on his right wrist! This thread or Sutra is unique in our culture and the faith it protects people doesn’t change wherever one goes, whatever one does.

Way back, onsite team means full of Indians working day and night, delivering every project through 'n' number of challenges... Now, we have Indians, Chinese, Americans as part of onsite team dealing with Indian & Chinese customers. I am sure the equation is changing and wondering, is it jus Silicon Valley or the entire nation made of ICs (Indians and Chinese)! BTW, both my clients are from North East part of US!

Savings...

My name is Abirami Mohanraj. I am a manager in a reputed IT company. I am married to Rajasekhar Vuppaladhadiam and have a kid of age 4 years. We both earn quite well and have a happy living. Life definitely presents its own challenges every now and then and thankfully we are also bestowed with the necessary tools to overcome them.

I was brought-up in a middleclass family. My dad with four kids and an ailing wife fought all along to position us where we are right now with extra-ordinary grit. I know what is poverty, I know what is pain, I know what is embarassment! But I am also proud of my childhood, for I am what I am now, because of it.

And today, I suddenly feel like a new brahmin! Nay.. it is certainly not what you think. I don't intend to create a racial clash here. Brahminism is considered superior in our caste system. Likewise, in this society, where everything is valued by money, I became a new brahmin in terms of materialistic richness.

From ashes to honor, should I say? Well, whatever, the urge in me to help, share and give has always been quite high. A number of times, I have surprised my husband with some instant decision to offer/donate/give something to someone :) and so far he has never said 'no'...
Conversations like these happen in our home - My husband asks 'who is he?' and I reply 'Oh, he... I asked him to come home to collect the donation cheque from us. So how much, 5, 10, one-time, monthly, yearly, ECS?' (actually I made up my mind already on how to donate, what to donate!) In all these, he participates whole-heartedly, that's the best part in him :) and why not when we both share similar life styles throughout...

But for these acts, my life would have been so bitter and ugly I would say... Finally I identified sweetness and fragrance in my life... These small drops of sweetness that I enjoy, I wouldn't let go of, come what may. This joy is not simply because of giving money. It is because of the human values I get back from it.

The smile in those kids' faces when they receive their new school kit, the smile in those oldage home in-mates for having a sumptuous meal that we sponsored as a group, the satisfaction in that parent's face when she sees her daughter go to matriculation school, giving all of them a ray of hope to survive - This light and fragrance, that I breath is so overwhelming...

When I die one day, there would be tears down our sponsored children's faces and many others - these tear drops are the savings for my kid! :) One of my well wishers told me 'remember, you have a daughter'... Yes, I got to save for my daughter and here it is - 'Grace'

Before I wrap up this article, one last bit - Let me also say, I am not gullible. Like I brought in another visitor for my husband - 'who is he now?', 'oh he... Bank person - Demat account. Stock market is not doing good now, good time to invest!'

Life is a balance, full of debits and credits! :)

Blame it on the hormones...

I am sorry, "Guys". It is yet another article on male-female analysis…

Men are given respect – Huge respect! For what? Any guesses? Not for age, not for job, not for character, not for their salary.
But because they are "MEN"; Oh yeah! because they are have more Testosterone than women; rather they are the proud owner of that proprietary hormone! :P

I vividly observe this in most household including mine. Mother-in-law won’t sit in front of son-in-law. Husbands are not supposed to do house chores - “Please they aren’t made for it. They are MEN”. This is not the case in most city households. If you travel South of Tamilnadu, you could see this in pretty much in many villages and towns. I am not sure if man of the house demands this, but has been provided to him, by default. So, no woman dares to question it. It is like ‘Sun rises in the east’ – rule of the nature!

It happened in my home "sweet home", a couple of days back. Cook was as usual on unplanned leave and mom not quite OK. So, it was my dad who rose to the occasion as always. At the end of the day, our kitchen sink was overflowing with used utensils and vessels. I thought it was not appropriate for my dad to get up early in the morning, wash everything and begin cooking. I casually asked Raj to help out as I was tired that day because I am a WOMAN (I mean cos of progesterone - periods) :P. He began to do it. That’s it. Hell broke loose with my parents. They came to me and murmered ‘ask him to leave it and go’, ‘he shouldn’t be doing it’! I was like ‘gimme a break’ and cut them off sharp.

I am not blaming men here. If you carefully observe it is the social fabric. Nice fabric – jus that it is not used properly, I would say.

On further physical examination, what is the real difference between men and women. Appearance? Organs? Thoughts? Emotions? – Pls, whatever it is... Let’s blame it on the hormones. Otherwise, you and me are humans, without doubt!

Let’s take a step further and do a comparison…

Human being is a great possibility. It’s something that probably every other species aspire to be. Human birth is the highest, next to God! (let me stop here and not turn spiritual!)

Now, what do we do with this human being. Men dominate women not just in the name of marriage, in every relation we have created in this culture. Now, have you seen any male animal doing this to the female animal? Don’t they take care of their lives well? Don’t they operate smoothly?

With that extra intelligence bestowed upon us, I think we have every right to live sensibly and treat each other with mutual respect and empathy.

It’s time (it’s too late already) we realize men and women are the same species – damn with those hormones! (I think we should let them do their designated jobs ;-) and not use it for abusing the remaining half). :D

Peace...
Abi

A leaf from my college life!

How I got famous in a day... A leaf from my college days!

Aug 17 1998, I was in GCT, Coimbatore in the hostel campus after completing all the admission formalities. My first day! I had absolutely no idea of what I was into. I was kind of blank. I did my 12th standard with unwavering determination to achieve something and not this college or degree [Not that I didn't want this, but thought I wouldn't get this] - My aim was to become a Maths tuition teacher and make a living out of that. However, my scores landed me here. With no imagination of my first day there, I was quite open to things and my priority was to get acclimatized there as soon as possible. To kick the unknown factors out soon of my mind.
I happened to know a senior there through my friend. Her name was Kalyani. My first socializing move happened through her. I was being introduced to the sophomores (second year) by Kalyani. As they enquired about me, I returned the gesture.

That's it! Like wild fire, my name was being spread for controversies among my own hostel mates and seniors.
This was why they were looking for me - "Who is Abirami? There is one girl who has come from Chennai and talking in ENGLISH. [And that was unpardonable then] Who is that girl who is asking questions back to seniors [like what is your name? where are you coming from?]? One half crack says 'Nice to meet you' to the seniors. Where is she?"

Terror! My fellow hostel mates were afraid to tell my name. They hadn't seen or interacted with me, just heard my name as I was the most wanted person. Know what? I was blissfully unaware of all these happenings.

With my unconventional but spontaneous behaviour though, I continued to become famous... Mostly related to ragging incidents.

For Chennai freshers, our train journey back home for holidays and vacation had always been a great adventure in itself. Soon after our first train journey, people were again looking for me 'Abirami interrupted the ragging session conducted earnestly by the final years in the train and said she wanted to go to sleep. No one has ever done that.'

This was very hard for me. Because, I couldn't instill any fear factor in me forcefully, especially for ragging. I continued to see the seniors as seniors. Nothing more than that. I found it extremely hard to keep my face stern and serious, when the ragging sessions were going on. Thankfully they were not harsh or abusive. It was jus meaningless. To put up a show as if I was terrified was so difficult, it was like I could burst into laughter anytime...

Anyways, years rolled by fast! and soon I became a mother... Wait wait... lots of things happened in between... Long living friendships, degree, job, falling in love (haven't gotten up yet), marriage, child and don't know what's next...

Hell with my view!

Your view or My view:

Views, opinions, judgements are all over the place… Except devils and dogs, I think everyone is all the time making comments about almost everything.

I got into a heated discussion with my bro sometime last week about culture. Each of us was profusely abusing each other’s views and thoughts.

Suddenly a grappling thought occurred. Who the hell am I to pass a comment or judgement on something someone did. Do I know all the parameters with which they performed that action?

Take for example, ‘He shouldn’t have ditched that girl and married another girl’ How easily said? Now, do I know what agony he underwent before making such a decision, do I know what transpired between the couple, do I know how things were conspired against him? Or do I know how his planets and stars were lined up against him? ;-)

I might have known a few things but not everything, not in its entirety. So, why don’t I just shut up?!

Each one is unique and each situation is unique. Every moment is different. No two people can think or act the same way.

I think we should leave it to them to handle their doings or karma, instead of spraying frivolous comments on people and their decisions. Right or wrong is so subjective and we can argue on it forever.

Now, am I going to stop talking about MMS, MSD, Sonia Gandhi, Tirupathi Balaji (yeah… I mean Lord Venky) or Aleem Dar? Oh pls… I am not Lady Good or Lady Right!
But I think I will not meddle with anyone’s personal decision not until I am asked to.

Sorry Bro if I hurt your feelings. Yet, please don’t provoke me again and testify this article. Because I admit I am not yet Lady good or right. ;-)