He is not my kind of a guy!

I met him. He appeared like a geek. Extremely strong in concepts of software languages. I admired him for his knowledge and articulation. But he is not my kind of a guy!

Dark, Tall and Handsome – DTH was what girls of our time were interested in…

My training got over. We parted ways having great admiration and reverence for him in me. But he is not my kind of a guy!

After a couple of months, I saw him in my work place. He came to see one of his friends. Casually exchanged a ‘hi’… I was quite excited to see somebody, a known face in the new work environment.

Few weeks passed by… One fine evening, rather night around 8:30, I again met him in the bus stop waiting for our MTC buses (obviously!). My sweet J24A bus never arrived for 40 minutes. We engaged in career discussion. Everything a fresher would be interested to know I asked him. He kept on missing all his buses until I got mine and boarded on to. Great ambitious person with keen aptitude… He proudly presented his business card. I was glad having found a “mentor” Nay! But he is not my kind of a guy!

I was eager to drop him a note next day itself. But I held back. “What if he thinks I am drooling over him” I spaced my email a week after… I clicked the ‘send’ button and consciously forgot about it. I didn’t get a reply for more than a week. But when I received his reply I should say I was elated. Warmth spread all over his email. Such a nice gentleman, I thought! But still, he is not my kind of a guy! A very good acquaintance!

So, jus to return his gesture, I too sent him an email! No! Not immediately, after a day or so :D Return of "return" of emails continued… We switched over to messenger instead of emails. You know, we wanted instant replies! :D

It was newyear’s eve! 2002 was bidding a grand goodbye to all of us. We decided to meet in a near by coffee shop. “What am I going to talk to him!” I wondered.

He was talking about his MBA plans, career, technology etc etc. I tried my level best to match him, mostly listening and asking “relevant” questions. :)

A good friend, may be... He is still not my kind of a guy!

Days passed! Our comfort level was increasing. Both of us were flowing like a stream. Our thoughts unbridled…

He was outright in saying “Don’t fall for me. I am not ready for another mishap. Let’s be good friends”. I liked the honesty in him and anyway, I was not “interested” in him.

A few more days passed… “What the heck! Where are we heading to? Let’s get married!” Didn’t care anymore if he was my kind of a guy!

He is still not my kind of a guy. We are poles apart in character, interests, hobbies, skills, ideologies, taste, everything. What is of importance to him falls to the bottom of my priority list! And vice versa!

I don’t consider him my husband. He is my friend with whom I am ready for a conflict any time.

But still at the end of the day, I look forward to his presence to complete my day!

My father in law commented "Leave two idiots alone and give them sufficient time. They would fall in love" How true it is! :)

New husbands!

Most new husbands I have seen are choked between their mother and wife. I had a casual conversation with my husband on this. While we were discussing about it, he made a comment, 'Any husband who loves his wife will do what is required for the situation. He will not sit through as the rift grows between the most two important ladies in his life'. I was actually shocked to hear this from him. Because it was quite blunt, second he puts the entire onus on the husband to strike a balance between mom and wife...

Now, as I think about it, I would say what he said is true... assuming you have good wife and good mother-in-law in your mother (mothers can never be bad, but mothers-in-law can be), if the husband does the mediator job properly, their marriage life can be very successful.

What if, they are not... some new brides are never understanding... they don't consider the MIL as their mother. Well, I also agree the feeling should be mutual. but c'mon someone has to start it...

and some MILs don't give the necessary time and space for the new girl to settle down. They don't realize the youngsters are having the most memorable time in their life. They are impatient and want to judge their daughter-in-law too soon, with their insurmountable expectations on her.

Oh yes, yes... there are plenty of reasons! If you watch any of the serials in Sun TV just one day, you will get to know... and if you watch it for a week, you may even commit suicide, beware of that channel!!

The message I am trying to convey is that husband plays a huge role in building the bridge between his bride and his family. If he is not interested in taking the right step, all three or the entire family's happiness is doomed. He should look through the situation or the problem with his maturity glasses and take the right action. Lots of tactfulness and diplomacy is required, in chiding or cajoling any party involved.

Ah... how easily said! But my dear gentlemen, give it a shot! :)